Finding Hope & Healing In Houston

To say the last few days have been overwhelming would be an understatement. What was supposed to be exciting and informative quickly turned to unsettling and confusing.

We arrived in Houston Sunday night after a rough flight. Both of us ended up getting just a couple hours of sleep. My consultation was the following morning at 10. We arrived and were greeted by the most accomodating people. Taken to the 2nd floor and given a detailed intinerary for the day.

First my vitals were taken. Then we met with My main Dr., Dr. Larisa. She was warm and kind and seemed genuinely concered for me. She spent about an hour going over my history in detail with us. After gathering all my information she left the consult room to confer with Dr. Burzynski, Dr. Gregory Burzynski and My Oncologist Dr.Valladares. We were expecting her to return within 15 minutes. 45 minutes later the previously mentioned Dr.'s entered the room. Dr. Burzynski spoke to us in detial, looking us straight in the eye the entire time. There was alot of information to take in and so many questions to be asked. In short, he is very confident that given the fact that I have had no previous treatment that would have compromised my health, and am in considerably good health otherwise, he fully expects me to recover from this and not have to face it again in the future.

First and foremost there is a myriad of tests that have to be done. The test that will take the longest to get results will take 2 to 3 weeks. He has a proposed treatment plan and list of medications for me. However he wants to gather all the information from the test as to make sure that he is not giving me unnecessary drugs. It is of the utmost importance to him that he do the best thing for me. All of my bloodwork was done yesterday. When I return home I will need to have an MRI of the brain. Once he recieves all of my results, he will then decide which regimen best fits me.

When I return in appox. 2 to 3 weeks, I will be staying for 10 to 14 days. In that time they will begin my treatment here. Monitor me and slowly up the dosage to the desired and tolerable amount.

The test alone are ridulously expensive. Some hopefully will be covered by Medicaid. Others we will be responable for. Between the money issue and the aggresive treatment plan, we were overwhelmed. We needed sleep and food. So we decided to go back to our Hotel and think about it and sleep on it.

This day was filled with more tears and emotions than I was prepared to deal with. I have only experienced these kind of feelings one other time, when my closest and dearest friend was killed in a car accident. It was too much to take. I was hoping to come and get the answers I wanted and that they would be obvious. This didn't happen. I was crushed and felt defeated. I have a tendancy of setting my expectations too high in situations. I wrestled for a while back and forth, trying to get everyones opinion and make the right decision. But ultimately it's my decision, and it came down to this, I HAVE CANCER, and its a very aggresive type of cancer that is not slowing down. If I dont do this, by body will fail me. This cancer has to be delt with aggresivly and swiftly. And I fully believe that this man wants me well. And has the best plan to accomplish it.

So after much prayer on my part and the part of countless freinds and family, plus much needed sleep, I awoke to a new morning and a new heart. I lost the peace I had temporarily, but it was restored with the morning. The crazy thing is I awoke Tues. morning with the song "You Never Let Go" in my head. Funny how that works:) We returned to the clinic that morning to move forward. As we walked in Dr. Larisa welcomed us and when she saw me and realized I was back, she let out the biggest sigh of relief and said to me "Oh thank goodness you've returned"! At that moment I knew that these people, without a doubt really cared about ME and getting ME well. Eveything from that moment on went so smoothly.

I was able to start on the first medication, the Antineoplastons Tues. We extended our stay one more night so that they could monitor me and make sure that I would have no side effects. If no effects then we are free to return home Wed. Our flight leaves at noon.

This is not going to be easy and I am bound to have really tough times ahead of me. But I know this is what must be done to ensure that I am here for my daughter! So although I am scared to death about what the future holds as far as treatment, I know God has never and will never leave my side. So I am putting my big girl pants on, placing my trust in Him, and we are going to get this done! I WILL get through this and come out the other side healed and better for it! So keep up the encouraging words please! They will help to get me through what lies ahead! I love you all and am so thankful that you allow me to share this journey with you!